You don’t need a license to be stupid

Jun 24th
Posted by shambo  as Government

Let me say this about that.

OK.  I have a question.  Why do you need a license to have a dog, but you don’t need a license to have a kid?  Hmmmmmm.

Why are we even required to have a license for a dog?  The best answer I could find came from the San Francisco animal control web site (check it out).  They list 5 reasons to license your dog.

1) If your dog gets lost, it’s the easiest way to reunite it with it’s owner.—- Forget the kid.  Despite U.S. Dept of Justice statistics (2002) that 797,500 kids go missing in the U.S. each year,  it’s the dogs that we’re really concered about.  However, from watching a few of these little rug-rats throw a hissy-fit in a restaurant last night,  I can see some wisdom here.   

2) Licensing insures your dog is getting proper vaccinations.—-  A law that requires medical care for kids?  Fa getta ’bout it.  Kids should grow up taking health risks.  It’ll prepare them for single’s bars.

3) License fees keep animal shelters going.—-  Apparently, in San Francisco, orphanages are funded through bake sales.

4) Your dog license shows that you are a responsible dog caregiver.—-  I love this one.  Any 16 year old,  crack-smoking,  high school drop-out,  can father a child with no legal requirements guiding this, apparently, frivolous undertaking.  But, In San Francisco, by God, you gotta show some responsibility to have a dog.

5)  It’s the law.—- Now that really says it all, doesn’t it? It makes no sense (especially taken in context of having a kid) but we must do it, simply because “it’s the law”.  In America, it seems that we have been so beaten down by stupidity that we have stopped thinking altogether.

I really don’t mean to pick on San Francisco, the whole country fits this model. There are stupid, misplaced laws everywhere.  In Ohio, you must have a hunting license to catch mice.  In parts of Florida, you need a license to skateboard.  But having kids?  Nah, our lawmakers are far too busy to care about that.

Some years ago, I lived in Oregon, an extremely liberal state, making California look like Alabama by comparison.  Oregon fishing regulations are very complex, and are neatly detailed in a book the size of the Warren Report.  Every fishing regulation is appended by the applicable regulation or exemption for handicapped persons.  Clam digging regulations are also included in this book, including an exemption for quadriplegics.  You can’t make this stuff up.

So, good citizens, avoid the $28 bucks San Francisco wants for an annual dog license. Have a kid instead…..or a cat, since there are no license rquirements for cats, either.  As I said, you can’t make this stuff up.

And, that’s all I have to say about that.







  1. Tracy  5th July 2009  

    This has certainly made me chuckle. All we need now is an article on ‘political correctness’ and ‘What is common sense?’ After all do you know that eggs contain eggs! or peanut butter contains peanuts?

  2. Derb  26th June 2009  

    Wanna have some fun with this and bust a few ribs? Twist one up, pop a cork and flip thru the wierd laws of the U.S. found at and you’ll never be the same! Just a few samples … somewhere in … IL – it’s illegal to make love while hunting or fishing on your wedding day, MA – it’s against the law to take more than 2 baths a month, CA (a mecca for stupid laws) – it’s against the law for animals to mate publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship, for ducks to quack after 10:00 within city limits and for a horse to fall asleep in a bathtub unless the rider is sleeping with the horse, AL – it’s illegal for pigeons to eat pebbles from composite roofs .. and a topper .. AR – it’s illegal for the Arkansas River to rise higher than the Main Street bridge in Little Rock. I guess you could punish ducks, pigeons, horses and other varmints but how in hell do you get punitive with a friggin’ river?!?!?

  3. Vickie  26th June 2009  

    Shambo, Do you really want to ask that question, I am sure when we arrived at plantation y.harbor,more than once, those people were asking these Big Dog B……if we had licences for you Big Dogs. Think about it!

  4. Phoebe  25th June 2009  

    I love it Shambo….we could talk forever on this subject. This could be a topic to submit to our politicians for a new law that would also help to decrease our every growing deficit. Here are the facts to support this idea .. if it works for the dog world, maybe it will work for the stupid people world…

    Reasons for Spaying & Neutering

    1. Prevention of unwanted litters.

    2. Prevention and/or reduction of uterine, ovarian, prostate and testicular diseases.

    3. Prevention and/or reduction of roaming, aggression, and undesired psychological behaviors.

    4. Prevention of litters with undesirable hereditary traits.

    Think about it….it would work!

  5. Dan A  25th June 2009  

    I see everyday that your comment is true that you don’t need a license to be stupid. I see some people with children and cannot believe that they actually reproduced. Great Blog, thanks to Billy Mac for sharing.

  6. Derekp  24th June 2009  

    I think i’ve seen this somewhere before…but it’s not bad at all

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