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Let me say this about that.

Last week, I posted a blog announcing the winners of the 2009 “World’s Toughest Jobs” awards.  The response to these awards has been tremendous and our loyal readers have asked that they be expanded.  Further, our fans want to be an integral part of nominating – and – awarding excellence in future categories.  As past awards focused on difficult and challenging professions, the readership suggested future categories concentrate on the opposite end of the spectrum.  So, this past weekend, I constructed a nomination short list for several additional categories.  Your job, Dear Readers, is to…    add to the list of nominees, and/or vote for one of the current nominees.  The three new categories are:  Most Overpaid Job, Best Working Environment, and  the World’s Easiest Job.

The nominees for Most Overpaid Job are:

1) NEW ORLEANS WELL DIGGER – “Just stick that tablespoon in the ground right here Fred.  Yup, we got water.  Go ahead and bill FEMA for $36,000.”

2) UNION STEWARD, MONTANA LONGSHOREMAN’S LOCAL #213 – “Damn Smitty, I don’t think our ship’s ever gonna come in.”

3) NASCAR DIRECTION FINDER  – “OK, Junior, go down this road and take your first left.  Then go a few hundred yards and take another left.  Go straight for about 1/4 mile and - this is where it gets a little tricky – take a left.  After another few hundred yards you’re gonna want to take a left.  OK, got it?”

Next, the nominees for Best Working Environment.  The categories have been broken out for men’s and women’s jobs.  As you might expect, the guys have their mind in the gutter with the following nominations:

1) SPERM DONOR -  You had to see this one coming (oops, poor choice of words, I guess). 

2) CONDOM FIELD TEST TECHNICAN -  Pretty much the same as #1, except kicked up a notch.

The nominations from the ladies surprised us as they showed that their suggestions were as ribald as the guy’s .  Their nominees for Best Working Environment are:

1) STUD MUFFIN TASTER -  “Oh, Judith, taste this one, it’s got nuts in it.”

2) SPERM BANK, DIRECT DEPOSIT TELLER – Gives the old military ‘heads-up’ alarm “INCOMING!!” a whole new slant.

And the last new category open for nominations is World’s Easiest Job.  The nominations, so far, are:

1) HANDICAP PARKING SPACE VALET - “OK, lady, just wheel’er right up here between these two big blue lines.  That’s right, best spot in the lot.  That’ll be 20 bucks.”

2) NORTH KOREAN VOTE COUNTER - Taking the ‘one man – one vote’ concept to the extreme. 

3) WHIRLING DERVISH DANCE INSTRUCTOR – “Listen-up, Mohammed, just spin around until you achieve enlightenment, or you just get dizzy and puke – whichever comes first.”

4) FACILITATOR – MORMON HOOKER’S GROUP THERAPY  - “Well Doc, looks like attendance is gonna be a little light again tonight.”

OK, folks.  It’s now time to vote, or add your own nominations to the above categories.  I will allow myself only one vote – same as the rest of you – but I would like to add my personal nomination to the World’s Easiest Job category:

PASTOR – CHURCH OF AGNOSTIC FUNDAMENTALISTS

And, that’s all I have to say about that.

Shambo