Touchdown Jesus

I must admit that in my advancing years, I am still confounded by the accelerating pace of the ‘dumbing down of America’.  It seems that facts, common sense, mathematics, and any sort of cognitive thought has been replaced by emotion, feelings, illusion, and fantasy.  Nowadays, how things really ‘ARE’ is not nearly so important as how one ‘WANTS’ things to be.

Let me give you an example.

Yesterday, the ‘USA Today Coaches Preseason Poll’ was released for the 2010 NCAA football season. There are several aspects of this poll that astounded even this jaded ‘ol fart.  TO WIT:  Notre Dame’s football team was ranked # 33 in the country !!  Unbelievable !!

It is clear that “The Almighty” has ‘cursed’ me with a  need for the application of facts before I reach a conclusion.  Apparently God has spared the coaches (who voted in the poll) this curse, because no one with at least the intellectual ability of a sea-slug  could possible have reached the same conclusion in the selection of Notre Dame as the 33rd best football team in the country. 

On the other hand, my ‘curse’ would have me consider the fact that the Notre Dame team from last year did not even  have a…    winning season.  My ‘curse’ would have me consider the fact that Notre Dame team lost their most prolific ‘passer / receiver’ combination in the last 20 years, to the pros.  My ‘curse’ would have me consider the fact that Notre Dame was not even invited to a minor bowl game last year.  My ‘curse’ would have me consider the fact that the 2010 Notre Dame football team has an entirely new coaching staff, with new offensive and defensive schemes, totally unfamiliar to the returning players.  My‘curse’ would have me consider the fact that last year’s final RPI  ranking ( the ranking system used by the NCAA to allot bowl games and select a national champion) granted Notre Dame a ranking as the number 57th  team in the country !!!

Sooooo………  in that Divine intervention is clearly in play with this selection, I have decided to take my dilemma directly to ‘The Boss.’

“Dear Lord,  why have you cursed me with a dependence on ‘logic’ in my decision making? And, Lord, why have you not also burdened the participants voting in the USA Today Coaches Poll with a need for logic, common sense, and a sense of reality?  Clearly, these nimrods are free to expectorate groundless intellectual feculence at will and have done so in this years placement of the Notre Dame football team among it’s peers. This collection of dimwitted dingbats have selected the 2010 Notre Dame football team to rise 24 positions …… from last years ranking of # 57 in the country …… to # 33 this year !!

Dear Lord, I realize all your earthly creatures deserve a chance to contribute to society, but don’t you think that the level of logic demonstrated by this ranking has a better home on the TV show – “The View” – than the USA Today Coaches Poll?

And, dear Lord, I can understand your desire to give meaning to the painting on the side of the building adjacent to the Notre Dame football stadium.  You know the one – the painting of Jesus with his arms raised as if to signal a touchdown – the painting the students have dubbed “Touchdown Jesus”.  But, Jeez (oops, sorry) let’s get real here  …………. not likely to be relevant this year.  Instead, you could rename the painting “Doin’ the Wave, Jesus” until common sense returns to the ranking of Notre Dame football teams – and grant relief to those of us cursed with the use of a functioning brain.

Amen.”

And, that’s all I have to say about that.

Shambo