You’ve won the lottery – now what?

Sep 1st
Posted by shambo  as Dumb-ass luck, Travel

Let me say this about that.

We’ve all done it …. imagined we have won the lottery and become an instant multimillionaire!¬† Yeah, I’ve done it myself (imagined – not won).¬† The burning question I always had was not ‘what should I do with the money’¬† but ‘what is the FIRST thing I would do with the money?’¬† Now, to¬†this question I have given considerable thought.¬† Wanna hear about it?¬† Thought so.


Gulfstream G550

“CONGRATULATIONS, Mr. Shambo, you have just won the grand prize in this weeks MEGAMILLIONS Lottery.¬† Your prize comes to,¬†after taxes, $87 million !!¬†

Shambo:¬† “Hello, NetJets?¬† I need to lease a Gulfstream G550 business jet for a couple of days.¬† I know that they say ‘if-you-have-to-ask-you-can’t-afford-it’¬† but I’ve had a really good day and I want to splurge.¬† Can you tell me about how much that might cost?

NetJets:¬† “Why, of course, sir.¬† We charge $8,000/hour, plus expenses and gratuity.”

Shambo:¬† “Not a problem.¬† I need to fly to the Virgin Islands.¬† Will this aircraft make it that far without stopping?”

NetJets:¬† “Oh sir,¬†we are quite the jokester, aren’t we?¬† The G550 has a range of 6,000 miles at 550 mph.¬† The jet has a boatload of…¬†¬†¬† technical features, but I will mention just two. 1) the couch folds out into a queen-sized bed, and 2) our flight attendants¬†are ex-Playboy centerfolds.”

Shambo:¬† “I¬†beginning to¬†see why you mentioned the ‘gratuity’.¬† Can I get something to eat on board?

$25,000 Caviar

NetJets:¬† “Certainly, sir. What would you like?”¬†

Shambo:¬† “Well young lady, as I said, I’ve had a really good day and would like to splurge on lunch.¬† I’ve heard about this rare Iranian Caviar that comes in a¬†24 carat gold tin.¬† Can¬†I get some of that?”

Net Jets:¬† “Well, we can hardly call it a ‘TIN’, now can we sir?¬† The caviar to which you are referring is Iranian Almas¬†Caviar, and is the rarest¬†in the world.¬† And yes, it comes in an¬†24 carat gold container.¬† If that is what you want for lunch, I’ll add $25,000 to your expenses.”

Shambo:¬† “Not a problem – not a problem.¬† You know Miss, you have been so helpful, I wonder if I might impose on you to make all the arrangements for my vacation?”

Necker Island

NetJets:¬† “Sir, with your obvious good tastes, I will devote the rest of the day just helping you.¬† Now where exactly did you want to stay in the Virgin Islands?”

Shambo:¬† “Oh Hell, I don’t know.¬† Someplace really nice.¬† Spare no expense.¬† Got any suggestions?”

NetJets:¬† “Well, if I am to take¬†‘spare-no-expense’ literally, then there is only one place for you.¬† It’s called ‘Necker Island’.¬†”

Shambo:¬† “Doesn’t sound too fancy to me.¬† Tell me about this ‘Necked Island’.

NetJets:¬† “That’s NECKER Island – not Necked island, even though, at the prices they charge, you could probably change the name if you wanted to.¬† The island belongs to British tycoon, Sir Richard Branson – you know, Virgin Airlines?¬† The island is a private resort on a 74 acre island, just off the coast of Virgin Gorda.¬† The main house has eight bedrooms, and 20,000 square feet of commons area. There are six ‘Bali Houses’ scattered over the island if you want a little privacy, as well as four pools and a spa.¬† There is even an open air bathroom in the VIP suite.¬† Clothing is optional and all food, booze, wine and champagne¬†are included in the $54,500 per night charge.

Shambo:¬† “Sounds perfect.¬† Book me for two weeks.”

¬†NetJets:¬† “OK, that comes to just a little over three-quarters of a million dollars.¬† MY, my.¬† You did have a good day, now didn’t you sir?”

Shambo:¬† “Indeed I did.¬† Now I’m going to need transportation from the Virgin Gorda Airport to Necker Island.¬† I get seasick very easily, so I would prefer not to take a boat.¬† Are there any other options available to get me there?”

Bell 429 Jet-copter

NetJets:¬† “I have just the thing for you.¬† Do you like flying in helicopters?”

Shambo:¬† “Don’t know.¬† Never been in one.¬† What’s it like?”

NetJets:¬† “I would recommend the Bell model 429, sir.¬† It is jet powered and silky smooth.¬† The top speed of 175 mph can be maintained for the full range of 4.2 hours of flying time.¬† This machine will get you from the Virgin¬†Gorda Airport to Necker Island in¬†under six minutes.¬† If you would like to keep the helicopter for sightseeing while you are in the islands, the charge will be $1,500/hour of flying time.¬† Shall I book you sir.”

Shambo:¬† “Oh, Hell yeah.¬† I’ll need it the whole time I’m there.”

Service with a smile

NetJets: “Will there be anything else, sir?”

Shambo:¬† “No, that ought about do it.¬† Oh wait. I have never done anything quite like this before, and frankly, I really don’t know what I’m doing.¬† Will there be anyone in the Virgin Islands that can help show me the ropes after I arrive?¬† I would really appreciate the help.

NetJets:¬† ” Sir, for a good customer like you, I’ll do it myself.¬† I will be waiting for you¬†on the beach when you arrive.”

Let’s see now:
Private jet (round trip) – $80,000
One Caviar lunch – $25,000
Two weeks rent,  Necker Island Р$763,000
Personal helicopter (14 hours) - $21,000

Great service – Priceless !!

And, that’s all I have to say about that.









One Comment

  1. Bader  25th February 2013  

    thats the most amazing thinking of winning the lottery ever i would difinatly like to do that hahaha

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