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Let me say this about that.

The LMSTAT blog has only been published for a couple of months, but it only took a couple of days before we started getting responses from other countries.  Germany, Switzerland, Greece, a few Arabic countries, and Russia – especially Russia. 

You don’t see most of these responses, either because they are sent to me by e-mail (rather than as responses in the “Click Here To Leave Comment” section at the bottom of each post) or, they are set aside as possible ‘spam’ by my software.  This software is very wary of international responses.

Anyway, I wanted to share some of these with you – indirectly – without fear of spreading some potentially lethal Soviet Spyware to the LMSTAT readership.  Let me start off first by saying that…    (more…)

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Let me say this about that.

I’m an old guy, which means I was raised as a kid – ‘old school’.  Today’s parents don’t know how to raise kids and are far too gentle in teaching them the life-lessons they will need to survive as adults.

In my entire youth I never received a ‘time-out’, a ‘go-stand-in-the-corner’, a ‘go-to-your-room’, a ‘you-are-grounded’, or an ‘apologize-to-your-brother’.  For every transgression I committed as a child, I got whacked.  Not one of those little love taps that today’s parents occasionally dole out, but a full, reared-back, Mohammad Ali type ass kicking.  As a kid, if punishment did not border on assault-and-battery,…    (more…)

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Let me say this about that.

We homo sapiens are pretty proud of ourselves.  We’re at the top of the food chain, we are masters of our domain, and we have prehensile thumbs.  But, we are also self destructive bastards and are one of the few members of the animal kingdom that has no natural enemy other than ourselves.  In other words, we lack true virtue and nobility.

What then, would you say is the most noble animal?  What animal should we emulate in order to improve on our own species?  What animal should be our role model for the elevation of our virtue?

What about the DOG?   The dog – man’s best friend - creature of undying devotion and loyalty – rescuer of lost children – protector of police officers – security guard for the family.  Yes sir, the family dog is…    (more…)

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Let me say this about that.

In yesterday’s blog, LMSTAT was pretty hard on the nation of Islam.  Nothing personal.  And just to prove it, today we’ll provide evidence that all organized religions are flawed in some ways by showcasing one that is popular here in the good ‘ol US of A – Christianity (go ahead and put up your lightning rods – we’ll wait).

Where would you imagine there might be just a teeny bit of room for improvement in Christianity?  One area that pops right out is “hypocrisy”.  No hypocrisy in Christianity, you say?  OK, lets run a little ‘Common Sense’  test on…    (more…)

What is it about the nation of Islam that pisses-off America so much?  After giving this issue much thought, I think I may have developed a reasonable theory. 

First of all, most Americans are not too bright.  You disagree?  Let me remind you that Americans have proven conclusively that “we ain’t too damn smart”.  After all,  polls show that Oprah Winfrey is one of the most admired Americans.  Marion Berry was RE-ELECTED Mayor of Washington, D.C. after he was video taped and busted by the FBI for…    (more…)

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Let me say this about that.

What in the hell is happening in America?  Where is that self reliant, hard working, courageous country I saw on September 12, 2001?  Somehow, in eight short years we have gone from the proudest nation in the history of man – to – a debt riddled, politically correct, pussy-boy, quasi welfare state.  In other words,  America is the new France. 

Something, maybe everything, has got to change.

Now before you politico’s start bracing yourselves for a message from a red state or a blue state, be advised that I…    (more…)

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Let me say this about that.

OK, I’m an old guy – and –  I’m a sports fan.  Not just spectator sports, you understand, but participation sports as well.  There are a whole host of sporting opportunities out there for old guys, especially for guys that are a bit portly, such as myself.  I must admit, however, that I am not skilled in any of these activities.  I probably never will be because I still don’t understand the basics of these games.

Take softball, for example.  I’ve played my share of softball and the best I can understand is that softball is just like baseball – except for drunk people.  That’s why the pitcher gently tosses the ball underhanded to the batter.  It also explains why…    (more…)

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Let me say this about that.

I’ll just come right out and say it.  I don’t get country music.  I realize it’s wildly popular, but have you ever listened to the lyrics of this drivel? 

Not exactly Rogers and Hammerstein.  I mean, these country music guys make millions of dollars by writing lyrics that would insult the intelligence of Fred Flintstone.  How hard can it be?

True to my engineering background, I decided to conduct an experiment to test the difficulty of writing a country song.  My experiment uses one of the most famous songs ever recorded for the ‘music’, and I have gone out on the street and asked ordinary people to…    (more…)

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Let me say this about that.

Yesterday, we attempted to establish some degree of parity with the annual publication of the U.S News & World Report’s Best Colleges in America by debuting the  Shambo’s Crappy College Awards.  The goal here is to give some of these poorly performing institutions an incentive to improve by taking away their ‘plausible deniability’.  Recall that in the post The Worst College Awards we started with colleges in the southern United States.  Today, we expand to other parts of the country and begin our criticism with the University of Notre Dame.

The University of Notre Dame is located in a small toxic waste dump called South Bend, Indiana.  Afghanistan refugees refuse to live there.  At this college, it is literally possible to get a four year liberal arts degree based on POTTERY!!  No, I’m not talking about “arts & crafts day” at summer camp when you were a kid.  I’m talking about going to a major university for four years and come out with what amounts to…    (more…)

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Let me say this about that.

Every year the  U.S. News and World Report magazine publishes their list of the best colleges in America.  That’s nice, however it has always been my view that unless abject failure is also exposed, there can be no progress.  So, with this lofty goal, I give you Shambo’s List of Crappy Colleges.

I’ll start in the South where I was raised and educated as a young man.  Now there are many fine institutions of higher learning in the South.  I offer Georgia Tech, Wake Forest, Virginia Tech and Duke as examples.  But there are also a number of real stinkers.  In my opinion (sorry lawyers), what follows is a list of institutions of ‘Lower Learning’.  I’ll start with the University of Georgia.

The University of Georgia isn’t a ‘real’ University.  It’s just a halfway house where kids go to…    (more…)